...who's the fairest of them all?
While I am almost positive that I look like a complete idiot when I'm working out (is that the reason my ninja sometimes smiles and won't tell me why...and why he makes me do things in front of the mirror? Quite possibly)...but there are people at the gym who decidedly don't. Would it be weird for me to go up and congratulate them? Because that's exactly what I want to do. I want to honour their dedication to fitness, their determination to make exercise a part of their daily routine, and celebrate their commitment to taking care of themselves. They need to know that they look stunning in spandex bouncing around in the aerobics class, running on the treadmill, or flexing in the the weight room, don't they?
My propensity for words often leads me into conversation with perfect strangers, but I haven't complimented anyone on their physique yet. I'm still trying to figure out how to look at myself in the mirror without averting my eyes. Seriously. I have lost close to 30 pounds, and it's probably harder for me to accept the way I look now than 30 pounds ago. Maybe, it's because I'm in the gym doing things that I never thought I would be doing in front of those mirrors. I have nothing to hide behind, and I'm wearing stretchy, sweaty clothing. Today, I was asked to look at my snatch in the mirror (get your mind out of the gutter..it's a weightlifting thing) and I looked straight ahead to make sure that I was in the correct position and then I looked up, so I wouldn't have to see my reflection. Maybe this is something I need to discuss with my mental coach.
Evil Queen face C/O Venomous Villains
I guess it has something to do with the fact that I've made drastic changes in my life that are affecting my frame, but the changes are subtle to anyone other than me. I can fit into the jeans that I already own, but I haven't quite gone down into a smaller size. I have dents were my waist is forming, but I'm still not comfy wearing a shirt with too much structure lest it show off my belly. My rational side says, "you're doing great...keep it up, you've made progress." And, my self-conscious teenage-girl side says, "you still look gross." There's also a voice inside my head that tells me that I'm a supermodel when I put my hands on my hips and stomp on the treadmill...so maybe I shouldn't listen to the voices.
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OMG..what if I don't have a pretty face?