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Ask Lisi: Don't let anyone hold you back from following your dreams

Young love can be intoxicating, but if you let it rule your life, you might miss out on great opportunities
Lisi Tesher, for Ask Ellie column

Dear Lisi: When I started university, I moved to another province. While in first year, I started dating someone who lived close to campus, at home with her family. I spent a lot of time travelling back and forth between school and home that year.

When summer came, I decided to stay at school and get a job so I could be close to my girlfriend. My parents weren’t happy about it, but said it was my choice. The only caveat was that if I was staying there, they wouldn’t pay for my rent. I chose to stay and my girlfriend and I had a great summer.

But early into my second year, the relationship ended. I came home that summer and met a new person. We had an awesome summer and I was sad to leave her when school started again. I spent third year back and forth again, this time because of her.

I have just finished my fourth year and have been looking into jobs, internships and whatever lies in store for me but based in my hometown because of her. However, since I’ve been home, I could tell something wasn’t right and I just caught her cheating with another guy. Apparently, they have been together for several months.

Now what do I do?


My first answer to everything – breathe. Now lift your head up and look ahead. Now that your travel ban has been lifted, start throwing a wider net. There may be a fabulous internship for you in California, or a starting position somewhere incredible in France. There is nothing holding you back from following your dreams wherever they may take you.

However, you must learn from these two experiences. When you are young — especially when you are young! — don’t let anyone or anything hold you back from following your dreams and having life experiences.

So, shake it off, even though you are rightly hurt. Move on. Live large.

Dear Lisi: My question is about the guy (on social media) who found a puppy in an Uber…. really? I find it hard to believe that someone left a puppy in an Uber, and that the Uber driver didn’t notice until he picked up his next ride. Puppies make noise. They whimper, pant, bark, move around, etc. I also find it somewhat unbelievable that the first thing the new rider did was pull out his phone and start videoing the Uber driver calling his last passenger.

The whole thing seems staged in some way. I also just heard that the person who left the dog in the Uber now wants the dog back. How do these two people have each other’s phone numbers? And why do they video record every conversation?

Too Staged

I saw that Instagram story a few months ago! I’ve done some research, and it seems as though there is audio/video footage of the original owner admitting that she can’t afford the puppy, which is why she left him in the Uber. Fortunately, the next passenger happened to be a dog lover who agreed to take the puppy home. There is also audio/video footage of the Uber driver corroborating the story.

There are also several other videos of the new owner explaining what happened, and discussing what has transpired, in that the original owner now wants the puppy back. Apparently, the pup’s saviour has a restraining order on the pup’s abandoner since she has now verbally threatened the new owner.

So, is it legit? Or just a staged skit? I’m not sure. I just hope that the puppy is being well-cared for and treated properly.

FEEDBACK Regarding the confused coach (May 20):

Reader - “Time to start putting things into writing. You, and possibly your coworker, need to start a paper trail record.

“The employer has a legal duty to protect their employees against harassment, regardless of cultural background. Why is management even permitting the parents to talk to their staff in such a manner anyway?

“Include photos of the broken equipment in your written statements. The owner/employer should be grateful for the backup to charge the parents.

“Keep a copy of the paper trail as you may need to include law enforcement if the issues continue to get personal. PLUS, if it’s not already being done, it may be time for the program to start video surveillance for the protection of BOTH children and staff. I would not put it beneath such parents to try to turn blame onto staff, especially as ‘culture’ is specifically mentioned.

“It may also be time to start looking for other employment.”

Lisi Tesher is an advice columnist based in Toronto. Send your relationship questions to [email protected].